Women of Chess
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Come and experience!

Godel Chess - Global Chess Part 1
Godel Chess - Global Chess Part 2
Godel Chess - Global Chess Part 3
Godel Chess - Global Chess Part 4

Godel Chess - Global Chess - Part 4 or Bach in Time
by Georgia Albert with Jan Newton & Dondelion

Candi and Bambi are busy working on a new article for Goddesschess. When an E-mail arrives from Isis...

Godel Chess - Mystery Solved!!!

Isis 101eyes@web.com wrote:

Hi Girls,

I need you to come over to my home this evening, about 6PM. I believe I have solved a mystery that we have been working on...

The Godel Chess, Mystery!
We will have a nice dinner and a couple of games of Goddess Chess.

Love
Isis

CANDI: Bambi do you remember where we put the manila envelope with the mysterious message and pictures?

BAMBI: In Manilla, most likely.

CANDI: Stop pulling my leg. I'll get a run in my stockings and really, they were quite expensive. I'd have to send off to the Silk Road to get them replaced.

BAMBI: Not nearly as expensive as they were in General Patton's day - if you could find them at all during wartime back in the 40's. Anyway, the manila envelope with all the codes and clippings is still filed under Men in Black. I'll go get it.

Bambi takes a step and pauses....

BAMBI: Hmmm... Files and clippings... Candi, remind me to make an appointment with my manicurist tomorrow. I'm really overdue.

CANDI: Roger, Wilco - over and out. Now step on it, sis! We have work to do and a deadline to meet. I'll get the Scythian bowl.

Ooooo! This is so exciting!!! I've had this mystery running through my mind for over a year...
But, I wonder what Isis has uncovered??

By the way, Bambi, why did you file it under Men in Black?

BAMBI: Well, I wanted to easily remember where I put the envelope.

CANDI: Please explain...

BAMBI: You know how much I like gorgeous men. Well, the messenger that delivered the mystery envelope was soooo gorgeous, and sexy, I knew I would have no problem remembering him and the envelope delivered.

CANDI: I can see your logic behind it... Oh No! I have been spending too much time with you Bambi. I am beginning to think like you do!

BAMBI: Is that a bad thing?

CANDI: No, not at all...

BAMBI: Here it is...

(She opens the envelope and pulls out the cryptic message and pictures)

O' MA GOG
ARAGON,
IT IS TIME TO PLAY
PAXON CHESS!

CANDI: I wonder what Isis discovered? Could she have found out information about the Knights of Aragon? Or, did she figure out what "It is time to play Paxon Chess!" means...Or, could she have discovered where the golden elephant is from?

BAMBI: Oh, the Knights of Aragon are mentioned in the movie "Zorro". Seems they were the makers of Kings, but no one is really sure. But, sure as shootin', right now we need to pack-up and get over Isis' house. It's almost 5:30!

CANDI: Fantastic! I'll get a chance to wear my newly designed thong swim suit. You know the one with the Escher tasselations fabric with the elephants.

BAMBI: Good thinking. Candi ... I'll get my suit ... I wonder what Isis could have discovered ... very interesting ... I wonder if...

CANDI: Bambi, there you go again...caught up in the mystery. So, who are you this evening? Nancy Drew or Sherlock Holmes?

BAMBI: This is so exciting ... The game is afoot.

CANDI: Always is .... Ms. Holmes.

BAMBI: Call Jake, and have him bring the car around please.

Their Major Domo, Jake, loads the girls 1969 Cadillac limo with a supply of champagne and caviar. (Showgirls never go empty handed to a party!) They hand Jake their bags and computers and get into the car chattering about the coded message, not noticing that the plexiglass panel separating the driver from passengers is open just a tiny bit. While Jake drives them through the glittering lights of Las Vegas, to Isis' pleasure garden, he listens intently to what they have to say.

Despite rush hour traffic, Jake gets them to Isis' house, where he makes sure the girls and all their things have been safely delivered. Then he heads off to a chess match he has been preparing for for many years.

ISIS: Dinner is ready! Your timing is just perfect!

CANDI: I'll open the champagne, and get the bowl ...

BAMBI: Where should we put our computers?

ISIS: On your laps! Silly!

CANDI: Ummm ... Then where should we put our laps?

ISIS: The pleasure garden under the crack willow of course...We do our best work there. Next year my buttonwood tree will be large enough to shade the dining table... I just love my garden! We are going to eat there too. The weather is too lovely to stay inside.

Candi, the glasses are on the table. Now let us relax and enjoy our dinner, and them we will get to work.

They enjoy a light meal of mushrooms stuffed with truffles and pine nuts, rack of lamb on a bed of rice pilaf. The girls tell Isis all about their plans to travel along the ancient Silk Road to purchase new and exotic materials for more chessly designs.

ISIS: Bambi, I made your favorite desert ... poppy seed cake.

BAMBI: Wow! That is so scrumdeliciously wonderful! I thank you from the bottom of my tummy, Isis.

CANDI: So will your fitness counsellor... Don't forget, if you eat too much of that, your clothes will hate you!

BAMBI: Food of the goddess, Candi. It's like chess. You can't ever eat too much!

CANDI: That's the immortal truth talking... But your waistline?

ISIS: Chesscake, girls... It's a bit fattening, but you can work it off in a few rounds. Just don't lose the spirit! Now gather up your champagne, I'll get the cake and we can get started solving the mystery we have been working on for so long.

CANDI: Hmmm, just in case, I'm going to slip into my new swim suit... before it's too late...

ISIS: Good idea ... There's a big river right smack dab in the middle of the Chinese game and something tells me we're going to have to cross it very soon...

CANDI: Well then, I'm not going to take any chances on my equator getting too large for this gorgeous new costume! See you both in a minute or two.

BAMBI: So, Isis, can you tell me how you solved our mystery?

ISIS: It happened when I was reading up on one of my favorite generals.

BAMBI: Which one was that? General Mills?

ISIS: No silly! This is not about tchef food. I mean, General George S. Patton Jr.

CANDI: (returning from the cabana in her new outfit) General Patton, she's one of my favorites too. The way she manages Goddesschess is why it is a premiere chess history site on the world wide weave.

ISIS: (laughing) Yes, Jan Newton, aka Patton, is one of my favorite people too. She is quite a player! But, Candi, I was talking about the great General George S. Patton. Maybe you've heard his famous poem...

BAMBI: Patton was a Bardic Bullmoose?

ISIS: Yes indeed! And if you don't believe me, just listen to this...
(Isis recites from memory...)

THROUGH A GLASS, DARKLY
by Gen. George S. Patton, Jr.

Through the travail of the ages,
Midst the pomp and toil of war,
Have I fought and strove and perished
Countless times upon this star.

In the form of many people
In all panoplies of time
Have I seen the luring vision
Of the Victory Maid, sublime.

I have battled for fresh mammoth,
I have warred for pastures new,
I have listed to the whispers
When the race trek instinct grew.

I have known the call to battle
In each changeless changing shape
From the high souled voice of conscience
To the beastly lust for rape.

I have sinned and I have suffered,
Played the hero and the knave;
Fought for belly, shame, or country,
And for each have found a grave.

I cannot name my battles
For the visions are not clear,
Yet, I see the twisted faces
And I feel the rending spear.

Perhaps I stabbed our Savior
In His sacred helpless side.
Yet, I've called His name in blessing
When after times I died.

In the dimness of the shadows
Where we hairy heathens warred,
I can taste in thought the lifeblood;
We used teeth before the sword.

While in later clearer vision
I can sense the coppery sweat,
Feel the pikes grow wet and slippery
When our Phalanx, Cyrus met.

Hear the rattle of the harness
Where the Persian darts bounced clear,
See their chariots wheel in panic
From the Hoplite's leveled spear.

See the goal grow monthly longer,
Reaching for the walls of Tyre.
Hear the crash of tons of granite,
Smell the quenchless eastern fire.

Still more clearly as a Roman,
Can I see the Legion close,
As our third rank moved in forward
And the short sword found our foes.

Once again I feel the anguish
Of that blistering treeless plain
When the Parthian showered death bolts,
And our discipline was in vain.

I remember all the suffering
Of those arrows in my neck.
Yet, I stabbed a grinning savage
As I died upon my back.

Once again I smell the heat sparks
When my Flemish plate gave way
And the lance ripped through my entrails
As on Crecy's field I lay.

In the windless, blinding stillness
Of the glittering tropic sea
I can see the bubbles rising
Where we set the captives free.

Midst the spume of half a tempest
I have heard the bulwarks go
When the crashing, point blank round shot
Sent destruction to our foe.

I have fought with gun and cutlass
On the red and slippery deck
With all Hell aflame within me
And a rope around my neck.

And still later as a General
Have I galloped with Murat
When we laughed at death and numbers
Trusting in the Emperor's Star.

Till at last our star faded,
And we shouted to our doom
Where the sunken road of Ohein
Closed us in it's quivering gloom.

So but now with Tanks a'clatter
Have I waddled on the foe
Belching death at twenty paces,
By the star shell's ghastly glow.

So as through a glass, and darkly
The age long strife I see
Where I fought in many guises,
Many names, but always me.

And I see not in my blindness
What the objects were I wrought,
But as God rules o'er our bickerings
It was through His will I fought.

So forever in the future,
Shall I battle as of yore,
Dying to be born a fighter,
But to die again, once more.

BAMBI: A poet general...

ISIS: He was more than that, he was a historian and like all great generals, a bit of a prima donna too. I wouldn't call him a saint, but he knew that if he studied history he would find the way to defeat his opponent... He traveled through the ages, very much like me. Looks as though Hitler also knew the trick of time travel and I suppose you could say that wherever a Hitler appeared, a Patton did also - or vice-versa. Even on the chessboard they are rather inseparable and have been throughout the ages. So, WW II is just another chapter the old Horus and Set, Cain and Abel book. It's a book with hooks. At least that's the way I see it.

CANDI: Isis, please tell about the connection to General George S. Patton Jr. and our mysterious message.

ISIS: Well, as you know, it all started when I began investigating reports into the mysterious death of Patton. Some sources believe he was murdered and this set me on a path to see if my archives matched any of their answers.

CANDI: Did they match?

ISIS: Sometimes yes ... sometimes no... You see, when Patton died, the Army placed his body in a soldiers grave with just a cross for a marker , leaving his remains overseas and away from his home ... which is a very odd way to bury an army hero! Any Patton historian would tell you that he would have loved to have been buried in his homeland. Alive or not, the conquering hero always relishes returning home to pomp, ceremony and a laurel crown. Just recently, Patton's body was removed from the original grave and re-interred in a memorial tomb. Alhough some people still feel he needs to be brought home, as far as I'm concerned, in the "before-life" and the afterlife, "where" is a kind of political non-issue. Besides, the way I see the universe, it's all the same "home" to me.

Compared to Jupiter, is any distance on this earth too far or near?

BAMBI: But, what would make people think that Patton was murdered?

ISIS: Well, that's the point. Things are not always what they seem and people often become confused by appearances. For many of the same reasons some might try to sneak seek a peek behind my veil, or search for the origins of chess, mystery and eros drive them forward. Call it a fix for "cognitive dissonance" if you will, but the real problem with trying to come up with heady answers to old questions lies in the way their work often instigates more confusion, argument and hostility among good people everywhere. Sometimes the instigation is deliberate and the problem is as old as writing itself - if not older...

CANDI: How old is writing?

ISIS: Almost as old as civilization ... and there are plenty of people arguing this way and that over which ancient cradle of civilization put the first letters together to make intelligible words and sentences. But really, there were lots of symbols being painted and chipped into rocks and caves before men learned how to write. With things like this little white elephant at hand, you can even detect how the icons of ancient cultures conveyed a number of important messages. That's part of chess, you know and there are people who do research into the iconography of chess that reach the limits of their own confusion by trying to trace the origins of chess to chessmen. It's a mystery to some, but it doesn't have to be...

In any case, some writers and researchers manage to put some very fancy theories together and the more convincing among them become hailed as "great historians" in their homeland. Of course, they also run the risk of being seen as propagandists by equally "great historians" living in other places. Either way, the more crafty and convincing are sometimes given important positions in universities, where they become revered as local heros. Too bad they sometimes spend too much time waging distant battles with the historians of competing schools and frankly, it often seems as though their mission is to bore people into agreeing with them. A lot of the better minds in attendance simply fall asleep during their lectures. They snore while professors bore and I don't doubt that that choosing shuteye over academic tunnel vision is a classic case of the better mind at work.

BAMBI: But our Chief, Ricardo Calvo, never bored us with his views. He was exciting to read and talk to in person.

ISIS: There are exceptions like Ricardo and his good friend Ken. And speaking of exceptions, there are great minds that don't fit comfortably in any camp. A few go on to become known as "conspiracy theorists". They can gain a lot of public attention by saying the most outlandish things and sometimes, they are offered lucrative publishing contracts. Like Dan Brown, they go on to sell millions, make millions and become world famous almost overnight. There are lots of things, both good and bad, you can say about any of them and I suppose the best you can say about conspiracists is that they cause people to question old dictums. Some "exceptions", like Martin Bernal, have been very successful in helping to alter entrenched views, although I would never put Bernal or Marjorie Gimbusta in the same class as a novelist like Dan Brown. In fact, there are times when very excellent research appears so radically different from Old School thought that the people who develop these new paradigms run headlong into waves of conservative resistence.

But now I must ask you that ages old question... "What is truth?" Can either of you answer?

CANDI: It seems to depend on what side of the fence people are standing - at least that's what I think I hear you saying..

ISIS: I think you think you hear me correctly. And, from my point of view, historians and conspiricists are much alike in many ways. Each may posses a little piece of the real story and gain personal stake in it. It can become so important to them that they often confuse their choice bits with the whole elephant. H.J.R. Murray made that mistake with chess and my dear friend, Pavle Bidev, tried to correct him. Murray wouldn't see or listen, even though he was given every opportunity. He reacted the same way to Don Jose Brunet y Bellet and dug his heels in so deeply that, even to this very day, the gods of Egyptian chess have difficulty forgiving him.

But only Isis knows what Isis knows and of course, in every generation there are always at least a few lucky people with whom she likes to share her elephant's memory. Patton was one of those and part of his long ride gave him bardic powers of expression as well as a general's ability to see through the fog of war. He understood it was all part of a vastly bigger game... a false one made mostly of smoke and mirrors.

BAMBI: Well, it's true that elephants are said to have long memories and can go anywhere they like. If you can sit on top of one, that might make a person very far sighted.

ISIS: Yes, they are colossal in every respect. See how this one strides upon the mound of creation - the ancient tortoise shell version of the globe? They can move rapidly over the ground like Patton's tanks. And, of course you must remember that some elephants can even fly! Mine does.

CANDI: That sounds too amazing to be true!

ISIS: Not for the elephants I know. But you'll have to trust me on that one - for the time being. Just bear in mind, there are some wonderful Indian allegories that speak of flying elephants and monkeys too - plus other stories told in Persia that describe large birds - Rukhs and Simorghs capable of lifting elephants and carrying them off to far away places.

BAMBI: Is it true that elephants are actually afraid of mice?

ISIS: No that's not true at all. In fact, mice and Indian elephants are actually very good friends - close allies really. Again, in India, its really all about mice, men, elephants, snakes, monkeys - and Moksha. Without all of them working together like a team, no one would be fed or clothed. Speaking of which, would you like another piece of poppy seed cake?

BAMBI: Yum! Don't mind if I do!

CANDI: But what do elephants have to do with you personally, Isis? That is very confusing! I can't recall recall reading about any Egyptian connection between Isis and an elephant.

ISIS: Actually, those connections are hidden in plain sight. Clearly, they are written and you don't have to live in Elephantine or Philae to know them. Very elaborate though they are, even in Rome the letters on the pages that point you in the direction of Thoth and his consort Ma'at shine like the very stars and if you close your eyes, you can almost see them. Otherwise, you can read about them in E.A Wallis Budge's wonderful translations.

CANDI: Holy Champolion! Bambi, could you pass the champagne and fill my plate with a few more of those delicious champignions.

BAMBI: Sure nuff! But do go on, dear Isis...

ISIS: I was fully intending to, my dear.

Isis takes a sip of champagne and forges on ahead...

ISIS: For instance, in Budge's translation we find that Thoth is known as the "asti", or vicar of Ra. That is very close to the Indian chess elephant's title "hasty" and al-pil, Pillyar, or Genesha as Bidev identifies the elephants of chaturanja and chess, who is also a kind of vicar cum vizier. No doubt Thoth - or a real human being very much like him, was also both the spiritual and administrative genius behind every pharaoh's throne, which also identifies him as the Egyptian equivalent of the Persian "mantri", Bidev's "giver of mantras". Thoth also has his own version of the yantra and mandala, in which he is depicted as "Thoth of the Four Winds". Be this as it may, he is certainly an important tutelary figure who, like Ganesha, is responsible for the invention of a great many things, much of it related to snakes, ladders and board game histories predating chess by literally thousands of years.

CANDI: Awesome! That shows how the viziers of chess and older games are all kind of related. Which one among them would be the oldest?

ISIS: That is one of the most difficult questions of all and if you go by what appears in the historical and the archaeological record, you would have to assume that Thoth has ancestors too. Otherwise, the writing is literally on the walls of Egyptian temples and coffins. Not only that, Egyptian games using snakes and ladders as boards are the oldest known games of any kind - older even than Wei Qi. Thoth is mythologically associated with Egyptian senet and that, my friends is something H.J.R. Murray chose to ignore in his Indian thesis.

BAMBI: So, good ol' H.J.R. decided to look the other way in his monumental, "A History of Chess".

ISIS: Ahem, I think he had his head stuck ... Oh nevermind! You know the place his memory is being kept sort of half alive here at Goddesschess ... I think that says it all ...

CANDI: Isis there any more you can tell us about Thoth?

ISIS: His subject is enormous and very important to my chess. We could spend days discussing him and Sheshat, his first great love. But, just to give you a quick preview, my cousin Thoth is more than an "asti", for, in certain cases, he is also known as the Great White One, which puts him in league with the Sri Lankan Murukan, the White Monkey of Rama's chess mythology and the Indo-Chinese Hanuman. And of course, Thoth's alter aspect is Babi, the baboon, which, like Murukan, makes him an often unpredictable and ingenious warrior opponent. Thoth himself is a very composite character. He appears first of all as a major god of Hermopolis, the city of Khemenu that is also known as the "City of Eight" and is often thought of as a kind of wizard.

Aside from what Mark Twain once referred to as "mental telegraphy", it seems as though there are other ways of understanding how all these "wizards" knew each other and came to share many of their most important ideas at times and places that are as difficult to fix in history as it is for historians to accomodate what mystics see with greater ease. We know that they all represent primordial customs that link together like a broken puzzle and there are some very interesting things modern research tells us about the Anatolian highlands that may be crucial to our restoration of their exact role. Otherwise, at a later date, discovering great tutelary figures and mystics gathered together in one counsel leads us directly to Alexandria, where we know important religious leaders from all corners of the known world assembled to discuss and inquire. Most certainly, they were meeting in Alexandria and perhaps many places elsewhere before their light appears to scatter following the Roman conquest of Egypt. Nowadays, they only emerge at night, during times when my magic cloak can give them shelter and safe passage through the stars. They are my people after all...

"Lux lucit in tenberis" - and that's what all these characters do best. That is how they can accomplish many amazing deeds, even as we sleep and dream.

CANDI: Maybe it's the champagne, but I think that just went over my head...

ISIS: Sorry about that! Allow me just a moment to put it into your head... The motto "Lux lucit in tenebris" is an old Waldensian one, meaning "Light shines in the darkness". We know that like the Cathars of France and Spain, the Waldenses knew many dark days, but never forgot how the light shone through, regardless. That makes them very different from your Men in Black and others like them, who deal in blocking with disinformation and prefer concealing themselves behind shades of truth in order to appear convincing. Nevertheless, even those who chose dullness over glittering night time splendor or the full light of a dawning day are part of Isis' game. Although they may deny my presence in their lives and cannot admit how captive they are within my cloak, I give them much pause to reconsider. Some do and and when I chose, I can shake them out of my pockets like lint and have them do my bidding despite themselves. How else do you think a Man in Black could come to your door bearing a brown manila envelope full of jumble? Even if the MIB think the contents of their envelopes are misleading, they have no idea how even misdirection can put powerful weapons in your hands.

BAMBI: How is that so?

ISIS: Even if the contents of your envelope have been tampered with, there are 16 ways to divine them. According to the Nyaya Sutras, the ultimate purpose of this method is the attainment of moksha through careful implementation of the sixteen categories. Things that lead away from insight often indulge in close fitting adaptations that flatter, but are no match the complete costume. When you come upon a crooked seam, at that moment, the opportunity to indulge in critical thinking becomes your treasure. Like General Patton, if, over the course of many lives, your ability to tie many zig-zagging pasts together into one Isis Knot should allow you to promote to rank in my army of stars, all the wild elephants, tigers, bulls and camels of bad karma cannot stop you from riding your own inner nature into the light - like a prancing pony. Of course, great dangers can come of that. Mortal ones!

CANDI: Can you fill us in a little more?

ISIS: It is true that by giving signs in such things as poetry, song or dance, those wonderfully fair expressions of the human soul can place a person in the spotlight of attention. Those who desire chess to be seen as as war game represent a powerful faction that does not like crossing swords with people who see the game in a sacred way because then they must come out into the open to do battle also. It is a sad fact of history that whoever happens to draw them out is often made to "disappear" - first by common treachery and afterwards from popular historical recollections ...

Those are just two of the many reasons I distrust most politicians, scribes, historians and the military. And, we know for a fact - and it may be the most enduring fact of history - that almost all popular histories are, themselves, the stepchildren of those victorious in war. Among us dwell a cabal of leaders and culture barons for whom any and all inconvenient truths generally fall under one murderous policy. Too often, unflattering blemishes are historically rinsed, whitewashed, painted out of the picture and conveniently forgotten. No one is really exempt and although many enduring truths take root there, I cannot discount that imperial Egypt delivered some of the earliest examples of political and religious propaganda known to man.

Biases apply to almost every form of communication... Ummmm yes, very diffcult to avoid... That's why I attend to the arts of dancing, chanting and instrumental music in a very special way. They all have a geometry everyone can relate to and enjoy without bending our minds in any particular direction. That is how and why creative expression of the sacred can take on an international character - one that we find restated in the high arts of Egypt, India, China, Persia and elsewhere - one that I have gathered up into my chess because it makes such a good point of saying that, like my cloak, the world is made of one whole piece of cloth.

BAMBI: Well that explains a few things about global chess - I think! - the deceptions involved in the actual play of the game, at any rate. I guess, you must know a little bit about the power brokers of the Allied forces of WWII.

ISIS: I know them all - even those of the Axis - and they give the impression of knowing a little about me as well. But these old poisoners respect nothing - not even themselves. They exist everywhere and at all times, giving lip service to every imaginable god and goddess in public while priming their cannons and building fortunes out of blood money. Cowards all - they skulk about with their "spies" - their bishops - and their dark knights - their Men in Black- searching out the moment of their next opportunity.

CANDI: Are we Showgrils in any mortal danger?

ISIS: You may be... I have witnessed these fleeting spies and serpents at work over the millennia. They come in many shapes and sizes. They bend the rules of my chess to suit their fancy and get off scot free in all too many instances. Few chess cultures can be absolved of that issue, though I must say, I do have a soft spot for them all. Western orthochess catches my eye in particular. That is most Egyptian looking. It is just a pity that Western orthochess thinks it has no soft spot for me. But I am there, nonetheless and even if spokespersons like Murray could not bring themselves to see what was placed right before their very eyes, mine is a game that dwarfs their conception of what makes chess come alive. You must know also that even if wily old foxes will try to hide their chess from public sight, I am not just the elephant in the room giving them bad dreams at night - I AM the entire room. The way some choose to play me is quite laughable, although the pain their games inflict upon the world is not.

CANDI: We feel our pain and theirs as well. Here - um - I think you might like this Kleenex...

Isis gratefully accepts and gently daubs here eyes, although the lamentations continue...

ISIS: Woeful is the way great empires are built of lies, greed and politics - built not to last, but to deceive for their own and the sake of spoil. Woe indeed unto those whom it escapes that chess was forged from the stuff of stars and that the blueprint of chess reflects more than just the light and dark of endless warfare. While there are divisions marching though the very universe itself and a play of matter binding dark and light, those who fail to see the unitary force that binds all opposites together into ONE THING while dissolving the illusion of life and death into a dewy mist are those destined to repeat their lessons until...

CANDI: Oh Ma Gog!

° Alexander building a wall against Gog and Magog ° 16th century Iranian painting on parchment ° Current location: Chester Beatty Library (Dublin)

ISIS: Yes, it is true that even Alexander put up an iron wall intended to deny Gog and Magog from entering what he thought was his part of the world. Mongols and Scythians stood on the other side of it and eventually they did break though. In time, they brought Tamerlane's game with them. It was not Alexander's iskundree or Persian chess they played, but close enough and in some ways, more elegant than any chess the classical Western world had seen up until then. But, all for naught my friends... Even if great generals like Tothmosis III, Tamerlane, or Napoleon extended the idea that they were actually conquering on my behalf, or on behalf of their own gods and goddesses, in fact, the world upon which elephants march is round like my womb and fits perfectly within it. Like all the other stars and planets that exist within my body, here on earth, there is truly nothing for anyone to conquer but fear, forgetfulness, suffering and illusion itself.

BAMBI: By Hera!

ISIS: And by Heka! But look now, my precious Showgirls, gaze into that orange bowl, this chess, or even those computers you have on your laps. Are they not all one thing? Our destines are as intertwined as our prognostic inventions - so, even if they do not understand, these Men in Black who play war games today have a tomorrow to look forward to and a past that will reign them into my handiwork no matter how hard they may try to resist. Although it can take many lifetimes to address what forms and functions Isis' chess has set out for them from the beginning, to those who eventually aspire to a break from master pawnbrokers, I will make of them what I chose - Men and Women in White Electrum - shining stars even. Yes, at some fateful point when the spiralling trails of their personal ambitions desire an imperishable apex, I will be there to receive them.

Surely, too, I can do this even for those among the living who desire a sea change. When at last they decide to book passage on my ship of destiny, beautiful boats of Ma'at will serve and there will be no French flagship big or proud enough to oppose entry into my harbor at Casablanca. Patton's military engagement there will not repeat - nor will Actium. Upon my Oceans, navigators of a better way make peace with themselves the very moment their bow kisses my lucky star and the horizon of an ever-dawning shore So too the gold stars of chess unite to become one stellar mystery.

Stella by Starlight am I and at any hour I may arise from the ends of the earth to greet newcomers and fold them into the wings of a wider horizon. On land - by elephant, on sea - by ship, or on in the air, my captive pawns approach from every corner of chess, all in search of the eternal moment in which they may become miraculously transformed into Gold Stars. That is my great and unending triumph here on earth and it comes to pass because gold star generals - gold generals, horses, elephants, rooks, ships - though once mere pawns, become openers of the way upon which the fates - the destinies of undifferentiated pawns of today may greet the future through the transformative mysteries of promotion. Yes, that is how one and all may become transformed according my winding path - my labyrinth... after which, virtual kings and queens restate their case, regardless of how the M.I.B. perform their rites or what some historians have to say about the dynamics of chess.

Showgirls you are today - but Showqueens will you may be tomorrow. Through the zigs and zags of fateful choices and decisions, like pawns, my Muse can make your asses golden. In a distant way, that is the meaning behind the mark of Zorro. Think of how the pawn zigs and zags at times - along diagonal trails to capture - and remember always that there are certain types of coronation no silver spoon can buy. The laurel Isis offers must be earned through tests and trails. It cannot be inherited like a title. It is the property of all by dint of universal laws governing everyman and every star.

So, there is always hope, you see - even for those who mistake my chess for a simple war game. But alas, a tutelary's work is never done. However, unlike yourselvesm I have an eternity to play with and take endless delight in deceiving even the best deceivers of this or any age. Would that I could deceive Aries himself! But he too is truly as immortal as human trial and error - much like the eternal adolescent who plays games of hide and seek with old age and wisdom. Even now, seeds of Bacchus, Nefertem and Dionysis' Trickster youth approach - so full of games! - but vulnerable to me as well. If I can woo them to love the same way Titania loved her Indian Boy and that simple weaver, Nick Bottom, that will bring them closer to me and the all conquering power of time, love and learning I have to offer. Like General Patton, once I can trick them into transferring their passion for war towards curiosity about the interplay of light and dark, the insight they receive will make it possible for them to become great poets, doctors, peacemakers and men of knowledge.

CANDI: So you are the Mobius that Godel, Escher, Bach and even Patton wandered through?

ISIS: I am that and many other things as well. Now you know a bit about the history of Patton, would it interest you to rediscover the history of my cousin, the Sri Lankan goddess Pattini? She is only an elephant's tour away and both of you seem to be dressed for the occasion...

BAMBI: An elephant's tour?

ISIS: A tour de force!

CANDI: The goddess Pattini?

ISIS: Why yes of course! I know that seems far, far away from Casablanca, Sicily and Dresden or any of the other places Patton drove his tanks - but you must believe that if you chose to come with me to Kataragama, you will be "tankful" for the elephant memories you'll take home with you after the visit.

BAMBI: But how do you propose to take us there? This is Las Vegas and Ceylon is on the complete opposite side of the world! We need to book passage weeks in advance and not even Jake and his Cadillac can get us closer than the coast of California.

ISIS: It's really very simple, Bambi. Just place your Faberge elephant inside the Scythian bowl and I'll take care of all the rest... The magical island of Taprobane awaits!

Candi holds the bowl steady to keep it from rocking while Bambi carefully places the Faberge elephant in the middle of the dish.

CANDI: What next?

ISIS: Now we all have to hold onto the edges of the bowl and count to "zero" - in unison...

BAMBI: - Count to zero in unison? But, how do we begin?

CANDI: Sound's like a plan - but I'm just as confused as you are, Bambi. It seems a bit like one of Zeno's tricks to me. He is one of the important characters in the book Godel, Escher, Bach, you know and his work is quite... ummm... "mathemagical".

ISIS: Zeno knew Isis. But, this is obviously something new for you. Zeno, Zorro, Zero... You'll get it when you do. For the time being, don't worry, you're in good hands as long as you don't drop the ball - er - I mean the bowl ... Just close your eyes, take a deep breath and remember to say zero all at once.

BAMBI: But, how...

ISIS: (introjects) Ah! ah! Shhhh now... It will come to you. For now, just close your eyes and hang on...

The girls close their eyes and after taking a deep breath they hear the sound of a mysterious voice reverberating in their ears... a squeeky male voice it seems...

VOICE: Zeno, Zorro...

ALTOGETHER: ... ZERO!

ISIS: Perfect timing! You girls are such naturals... Now open your eyes, place the bowl gently on the ground between us and step seven paces back from it. Quickly now! Shake those Showgirl gams!

All step seven paces back from the bowl and stare in wonder as something remarkable begins to happen. At first it seems the tiny Faberge elephant is actually swinging its trunk. But then, following a trumpet that was really no louder than a mousy squeak, it actually began growing larger before their very eyes. In a matter of a few seconds they are looking up at a huge elephant - a living Faberge ornament grazing in Isis' back yard.

CANDI: (rubbing her eyes) Must be the poppy seed cake ...

BAMBI: (fearfully clutching Candi like a long lost relative) ... or maybe it was the champagne ...?

From atop the elephant's giant head the Indian little driver yawns, streches, slowly leans over from the top of his mount and with a rich Indian accent ...

DRIVER: I'm glad you heard me counting down. It's good to be me again. Now, did I hear someone mention poppy seed cake? That is my favourite food!

BAMBI: (astonished) Jake! Is that you?

DRIVER: Yes its is - but in my Indian alter form. You must understand. I am quite "non-local"...

CANDI: I'm not sure I do... But, oh my goddess! I'm afraid we ate all the cake!

JAKE: Oh, that is very much too bad. Maybe you have some moksha for this hungry elephant?

BAMBI: No, but we have moksha patamu and a truffle or two for you, dear boy.

JAKE: Truffles? Trifles? Troubles? I eat them all just the same. It's all the same Tantra to me...

But moksha patamu? Snakes and ladders!! That is really something rich! It is a very wonderful food of the gods. The elephant likes it very much! Transporting, but not to filling, you know. For fuel, the elephant says it will do splendidly!

(turning to Isis)

Now you, beautiful goddess lady, I think you have a question to ask me ...

ISIS: (Smirking slightly and pointing at the elephant) Pardon me boy, is that the Kataragama Choo Choo?

JAKE: Yes, indeed it is - most certainly so. And you are on track twenty nine ... (numerological 29 = 11 = 2)... or track two, depending how you look at it...

CANDI: I hope we'll get there on time ...

BAMBI and CANDI: (breaking out their song and dance act!)

There's gonna be a certain party at the station ...
All satin and lace ...
We used to call funny face...

"Funny Face"

JAKE: All aboard!

With help from the driver, all three climb up into the elephant's turret ...

JAKE: Now you have to help me start my elephant's engine. Do you know how that is done?

ISIS: Yes we do!

CANDI: We do?

ISIS: Repeat after me... Zeno, Zorro, Zero, Zoom!

JAKE: (Chuckling) Ah very good! The "om" in zoom - Yes, I like this sound so very much! I can see the lady is most wise. Om is like the key to the elephant's ignition. No ignition - no transmission - no transmission - no go!

BAMBI: Go is a good game -

JAKE : And you, dear ladies, certainly know how to turn us on! The Elephant and I are at your service and let me say, if you like magic, games, beautiful costumes, flowers, incense, singing songs and happy people dancing, Kataragama is a very good place to go. It is like the Las Vegas of India, you know. Fortunes are said to be found there. The experience can be priceless.

Whoops! I'm getting ahead of myself as usual. So altogether now! - Let's say the kind lady's words of power and I guarantee a very good thing will happen...

CHANTING ALTOGETHER: Zeno, Zorro, Zero, Zoom!

With that, the elephant begins to rise slowly from Isis's pleasure garden ... Higher and higher it levitates, until it is well clear of the crack willow ... then, all at once, wings sprout from its sides, it emits a loud trumpet and suddenly, the girls find themselves breezing across a clear blue western sky... following the sun on a flying white elephant.

JAKE: (shouting) Hang onto yourselves! We will be in Katargama in no time!!!!!

When you hear the whistle blowin' eight to the bar
Then you know Kataragama's not very far
Shovel all the coal in
Keep the dice a rollin'

(Whoo Whoo Kataragama there you are)

(to be continued ... perenially)